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January 16, 2008
Anthology of Demonology: My Night With Ozzy Osbourne and Rob Zombie
Hello my little chickadees and welcome back to Write Again Soon. I realize I dropped off the map for a bit, so before delving in the scintillating events of my week, let's take a brief moment to review.
December 23 – December 30
Over the holidays I took a few days off from the Big Idea—the first time in 2007 that I had stepped away from the computer for more than 12 hours at a time. It was glorious, this long-forgotten ability to sleep several times during any 24 hour period, the delight of getting drunk on chocolate martinis, the sheer pleasure of doing laundry on a normal schedule and having a choice between THREE clean shirts.
New Years Eve
Mr. Pilot and I rang in the New Year at a swanky party in which I consumed a number (perhaps three, perhaps seven) alcoholic beverages, danced with sundry people until my feet ached, and managed to walk home in a huff more than half a mile to our hotel because of a shocking lack of cabs. Upon arriving in our room, Mr. Pilot did the manly thing in taking off my shoes, coaxing me out of my dress, and getting me a tissue when I burst into uncontrollable drunk sobbing. I think I made it up to him the next day, with 12 hours of watching football in bed and various other athletic activities.
January 1 – 10
Like all good things, my vacation had to end and rather than simply go back to the status quo I instead began 2008 with a progressively worsening cough. What was originally a small tickle at the back of my throat morphed into a hacking, braying commotion that suggested something was seriously amiss. I was sure it was tuberculosis; my sister thought it might be whooping cough—I believe the bubonic plague was even briefly considered. When I started coughing up blood I knew the time had come to see some uncovered-by-my-nonexistent-medical-insurance professional help. Turns out that I had bronchitis. The good news is that it is relatively easy to treat, the bad news is that it can last 4-5 weeks.
Smattering of Events in the Interim
But while all of this has been going on (including continuing sleepless nights—oh the coughing!), life has not stopped. No dear reader, I have made it a point to plunge ahead with life. Some of the recent highlights include:
-- My first heavy metal concert! I saw Ozzy Osbourne and Rob Zombie at the Verizon Center with Mr. Pilot. I was filled with trepidation, but actually enjoyed myself in between coughing fits. A key to my contentment was the realization that Ozzy has greatly mellowed out in his old age. There was no spewing blood, no channeling Satan, no biting the head off a bat. Instead, it was a little "spray the front rows with foam" and "put lots of boobs up on the big screen during the guitar solo". In case you were wondering, my boobs stayed safely ensconced in their proper place.
-- Janie's basketball game! You haven't lived until you've seen twenty 6-year old girls play basketball in a tiny gym. There is a remarkable amount of crying, a strange "swarming" move around the ball that is unrecognizable as offense/defense, and at least one girl who simply cannot chuck the ball up to the rim. Ever.
-- Tap dancing class! Ok, the classes don't actually start until next week, but I'm all signed up with the community college and have even purchased some very fancy tap shoes. As far as I can tell, there is no recital, although I may end up scheduling my own little performance where all my local fans can come to appreciate my rhythm and moves. Brace yourselves now. (Note: this will be a family affair, as my sister—and possibly my mom—will be taking the class, and Janie is considering an age-appropriate class as well. If the Nazis try to invade, we can organize some sort of family tap dancing extravaganza to disguise our evacuation from the city and our escape over the Alps.)
-- Scary Big Idea stuff! The uncertainty in the economy has resulted in several large clients pulling out of their negotiations with me—leaving me in the lurch and not a little bitter about the proposal work I did that has all come to naught. I'm not panicking yet—but I'm definitely thinking about the coming months and my ability to sustain the business in the event that more clients don't come through.
So…that's about it. If you're wondering about the times when I wasn't at a concert or watching a child's basketball game or paying an exorbitant sum for tap shoes…well, I was napping. Or coughing. Or coughing during a nap. But now that I have finally caught up on my sleep, hauled myself back on the Big Idea bandwagon, caught up with my laundry, and even managed to go grocery shopping—the time has come to once again share my life with you dear reader.
We'll begin tomorrow with a rundown of the items in my refrigerator—also known as "how long can those two beers hold out all alone in there?"
Comments
Welcome back!
Posted by: Elizabeth at January 16, 2008 09:12 AM
