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December 30, 2006
Things of Note This Christmas
Despite a spate of depressing moments leading up to Christmas (cue the scene where I burst into tears THREE separate times while driving home from a holiday party), the last few days have actually been quite pleasant.
In some sort of Christmas miracle, Janie has abandoned her I-know-it-all-so-please-go-away-Aunt-Jen attitude and been a delight since last Saturday. She's been swept away with the joy of receiving a Barbie doll and dog. [Note: it's really the dog that gives her the giggles, since it eats food and the poops it out—who knew such a thing existed, let alone would entertain a 5-year old for hours upon hours?)] And we've all taken a solemn pinky promise to be on our best behavior—"even Grandad". If I knew it just took the wiggle of my smallest digit to wreak this transformation, I would have been wringing her pinky years ago.
The much maligned trip to Williamsburg has not been so terrible—although the drive itself was quite an adventure. First off, the directions estimated that the trip would take us, oh, approximately 2 hours and 57 minutes. Apparently, Google doesn't take into account post-Christmas traffic because we actually clocked the drive at 7 hours and 24 minutes. That's a LOT of family time to be stuck in a minivan packed to the gills, dear reader.
Then, it turns out that my mom accidentally googled the wrong directions and so instead of ending up on the military weapons base (where we had rented a nice little 3-bedroom cottage—insert your own ironic comment), we ended up in a McMansion subdivision with no idea where we'd gone wrong. A quick stop at the liquor store set us right, and even added to our wine stash—a strategic move that would pay dividends later.
So here I am sitting in the living room in the cabin (which is certainly as nice as our military base house in Japan) and trying to catch up with some Big Idea stuff. But rather than do that, dear reader, let's engage in some "live blogging".
[Live Blogging]
Jessica's boyfriend has decided he would like to be referred to as Eagle Six. He is refusing to append the traditional "Mr." prefix, claiming to "make his own rules". This, dear reader, will not stand. Instead, he shall now be called Mr. Gator.
Mr. Gator would now an explanation to be put into this entry about the origins of his name. But since I don't know the origin, and he's too busy complaining about the Jewel song currently being played on Jessica's new iPod, no explanation will be provided. Perhaps he will grace the blog with a comment—even though I am tempted to block his IP address because of his very negative attitude towards others readers of this blog. (I promise, you don't want to know what he thinks of you…the term "very lonely" was used…)
Jessica is now asking for any reference to Mr. Gator as her boyfriend to be removed post haste. I am sympathetic to her cause, but it's too late to go back now.
Mr. Gator is now rocking out (with full head-bob) to Angel of the Morning, which is playing loud enough on Jessica's iPod for me to clearly hear it across the room. His performance is so breath-taking that I shall now refer to him as Mr. Eagle Six a.k.a. Mr. Gator a.k.a. Mr. Angel of the Morning. Since it takes too long to type that out each time, we will simply refer to him from now on as Mr. Angel of the Morning (or possibly, as The Gator), but never just Eagle Six. Oh no.
[/Live Blogging]
OK, that was quite enough. I grow weary of Mr. Angel of the Morning, and besides that he's now on to an awkward rendition of Me and Bobby McGee. Let's now list a couple other pertinent "boy" facts that have occurred, just so you can stay up to date:
Once again, Mr. Pilot and I are on the fritz. After cancelling on me last Friday because of a "cold" I haven't heard from him. A text message and a phone call have gone unreturned, and I'm beginning to tire of the game. It's either on or it's off, and at this point I will be sad (but not heartbroken) if we don't end up married with three kids.
Mr. Bethesda and I are actually forming a friendship, which is perhaps the strangest and most unexpected thing to happen this December. He even stopped by on Christmas Eve to see me for a bit, and said hi to the whole family (which is more than my dates have done since Mr. Music back in the fall).
I've decided to stop the whole online dating thing. As Ms. Wish to See so insightfully points out, juggling multiple guys at once takes a lot of time—time that I should be devoting to figuring my life out (or at least billing for the Big Idea). So as of January 4th, dear reader, I'm on my own.
Update: Note to self, no more "blogging while drunk". No indeed. But in the interest of my reading public--I just KNOW there are more than 3 of you, dear readers, no matter what Mr. Angel of the Morning says--I will post the original entry in its shameful, verbose entirety.
Oh, and Mr. Pilot and I are back on. Maybe. He is the epitome of mixed signals. Just thought you should know.
Comments
Hmmm. I didn't know "very lonely" was a negative thing... my belief that it is a positive state of being is the only thing that gets me up in the morning.
Posted by: kevin at December 31, 2006 04:35 AM
Could the poor man (Mr. Pilot) be trying to "play it cool?"
I won't hold Mr. Angel in the Morning's comments against him. Considering how many of us he nows personally (I am NOT Lonely!) I am sure it was just holiday stress that made him say such a thing. Right?
Posted by: La at December 31, 2006 09:00 AM
