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October 15, 2004
Tired
It's been a long week, and I'm worn out. Even though its Friday night and I have no reason to be up early tomorrow, I have sequestered myself in my room for the evening. I'm relishing this time alone, finishing my book, eating ramen, and maybe watching a movie later. I've spent a lot of time with the group lately, and it's nice to have some "alone" time.
Jess and I were up early this morning to look at an apartment downtown. It was ok, but since it was the first one we've seen, it's hard to make a general assessment. One thing that I really didn't like was that electricity wasn't included--the last thing I want is to have to deal with another bill every month. So the search will go on this weekend.
I was really struck by Kevin's entry today--where to draw the line with money is something that periodically haunts me. In one sense, I think I would be happy living in a rural village, with an outhouse and no electricity. In some ways, live would be so simple and straightforward--I wouldn't be surrounded by all the temptations of the 21st century.
On the other hand, I want to be realistic and acknowledge that I will probably never live that life. In some ways, it's harder to find a balance in the "real" world. If I plan to be part of the business world in America, I will probably need access to a car, will definitely need a full complement of business attire, and will probably spend a small fortune on entertainment, dining out, and travel. How do I do that sustainably? How do I weigh every decision against sustainability constraints when I'm surrounded by a society that says "I've earned it, I deserve to spend it"? This paradox, I think, is one of the specific challenges for America as it faces environmental and social degradation.
